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I highly recommend using lube every time you touch yourself. Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Tease yourself over your clothes. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? This is one of my specialties I've even created an online program dedicated to helping women learn how to orgasm. I highly recommend grabbing a hand mirror and getting up close and personal with your genitals. I can completely understand feeling embarrassed or anxious, but try to see if you can make the experience of touching yourself sexy.

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Remi. Age: 30.
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The clitoris likes to be touched in different ways based on how turned on you are, how comfortable you are with yourself or your partner, the timing in your cycle , or even pure random coincidence.

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Colette. Age: 30.
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Work your way up with the level of pressure you use until you find something that feels good but not uncomfortable. Try circling your finger around your clitoris, scooting closer and closer until your finger is grazing against the sides of your clitoris. Think about it like a back massage — some people love getting their backs practically pulverized, while other people prefer really gentle caresses.

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